May is Motorcycle Saftey And Awareness Month and even though Ride To Work day is officially June 20th this year, there was a group of us at my work who decided to do it today.

I work for local county government. Every Tuesday morning, we have a public meeting of the Board of Supervisors. Today in support of  the employees who are motorcycle enthusiasts, our board has an agenda item to approve a proclamation declaring May to be Motorcycle Safety Awareness Month. Awesome!

We’re going to have a Motorcycle Safety and Driver Awareness presentation by Ride Arizona Motorcycle Training Center and then gather together for a photo.

I think it’s really cool that my workplace is supportive of its employees who ride. This is rural Arizona. If you’re gonna ride your bike to work, you may as well live here.  The photo below is me driving home on “my street” (which is a 7 mile private road).

My friend Eric posted this on his blog and I stole it. I’m not going to try and make this sound original. I completely ripped it off – changing the answers to my own of course.

4 Things I need to spend more time on in my life:

  1. Helping others
  2. My relationship with my mother
  3. Exercise (never ending)
  4. Appreciating the little things

4 Things I need to spend less time on in my life:

  1. Regretting the unchangeable past
  2. Hating anyone or anything
  3. Staring at a computer screen
  4. Worrying and being fearful of things I have no control over

4 Things I wish I could spend more time on in my life:

  1. Inner peace/spirituality
  2. Making music
  3. Riding my motorcycle
  4. Doing anything creative

4 Things I love about myself:

  1. I’m left-handed
  2. I’m fairly easy on the eyes
  3. My stature
  4. My big huge…heart

4 Things I hate about myself:

  1. I’m too hard on myself
  2. I’m incredibly self centered
  3. When I get really angry, I cry (HATE that)
  4. My low threshold to pain

4 Things I love that I used to hate:

  1. Vegetables
  2. Exercise
  3. Pool volleyball
  4. Myself

4 Things I hate that I used to love:

  1. Disney movies
  2. The greater Los Angeles area
  3. Sugary soda pop
  4. Politics/politicians

4 Things I look forward to:

  1. Growing old with Ray
  2. Summer
  3. Evening and/or weekend cocktails with friends or with Ray
  4. Having my Alone Time

4 Things I dread:

  1. Performing (YES performing! Scares the crap out of me.)
  2. Winter
  3. Conflict of any kind
  4. Aging, wrinkles, getting gray

4 Things I once believed in but no longer do:

  1. Our political system
  2. Organized religion
  3. American cinema
  4. Consumerism

4 Things I believe in that I didn’t use to:

  1. My own inner strength (You can be your own best friend? Who knew?)
  2. The placebo effect
  3. Mind over matter
  4. Love

4 Things I love to do but I’m bad at:

  1. Golf
  2. Sing
  3. Act
  4. Write

4 Things I hate to do but I’m good at:

  1. Technical troubleshooting
  2. Photo retouching
  3. Changing a flat tire
  4. Running

4 Things I did that I am ashamed of:

  1. Make my mother cry (On several occasions)
  2. Stole lots of money from my family (Bad kid with a drug habit)
  3. Got permanently expelled from High School
  4. I spent way too many years hating myself for being homosexual

4 Things I did that I’m proud of:

  1. Completed a four-year college program in three at the age of thirty-three
  2. I was writer/director Frank Darabont’s assistant on his film The Shawshank Redemption
  3. Played a gig at the world famous Roxy on the Sunset Strip with my former band “November”
  4. Took care of my father when he was dying

4 Things I didn’t do that I regret:

  1. A very close friend of mine was suffering from HIV complications in 94. When he got really sick, I couldn’t look at him. I avoided him and then he died. I never got to say goodbye.
  2. Start exercising while my body was producing its maximum amount of testosterone (Much different trying to bulk up at 45)
  3. Become a professional performer – I never even tried
  4. Save money for retirement sooner

4 Things I want before I die:

  1. A better world
  2. About 50 more years of being ambulatory, great skin and lots of sex
  3. Ray with me for those 50 years
  4. I want the people in my life to also have a happy wonderful long-lived life experience

Ray and I moved into our house almost five and a half years ago. We didn’t have a dining room table. Our house has a mid-century/contemporary feel to it.

One day when the house was under construction, while visiting Ray’s mother in California, we were sitting around the dining room table talking. I looked over at one of the captain’s chairs (the set has two) and noticed that the chair had some really cool angles going on. I had never noticed that before.

Since I can remember, the dining table at Ray’s mom’s house was covered with a huge tablecloth. The upholstery was some sort of tan woven vinyl and the wood was dark brown. I never took notice of it.

Suddenly my interest was getting the best of me. I lifted up the heavy over-sized tablecloth and saw this:

I motioned to Ray and mouthed, “Look at this!” Ray took a look and then did a double-take. Ray’s mom had a totally cool dining set! She was also 89 years old and slowing down. We decided to hold off on buying a dining room set. What’s the rush?

Fast forward five years. Ray’s mom is still here but bedridden and really, really slowing down. We’ve been using a nasty old folding banquet table with cheap white stackable plastic chairs. I was starting to get impatient with our “temporary” dining set.

Once again, we were visiting Ray’s mom. I sat down on one of the chairs and noticed it was very wobbly. I took a look at the chairs and discovered they were all on the verge of collapse. I got worried. Ray talked to his siblings and they agreed that it would be OK to take the set. Ray’s mother had been bedridden in the back room for a year. It was better to take the table and have it repaired than to have it break.

During the time we were waiting for the dining set, we had noticed that there were a few other pieces of furniture that would do well in our house. Two rocking chairs and a bedroom set.

A couple of months ago, we rented a truck and drove the dining set, bedroom set and two rockers from California to Arizona. The bedroom set was in mint condition.

Coincidently, it’s the same bedroom set that Major Anthony Nelson has in his room on the I Dream of Jeannie television series.

The dining table and rocking chairs needed some work so we took them to Dadd’s Refinishing & Upholstery in Sierra Vista.

We just got everything back yesterday. Ray and I are both very pleased with the work. The table was completely stripped and returned to its blond color. (Ray’s mom had it stained dark brown in the 70’s – because that’s what you did back then.) All the chairs were refurbished and are sturdy again.

The rockers were reupholstered and restained. We put one in the Master bedroom and one in the guest room.

We finally have a dining set! We finally have a bedroom set! For five years our bedroom was nothing but a king-size mattress & box spring on a frame flanked by two outdoor folding tables as night stands. It looked like a dorm room.

I am very thankful to have this furniture. It’s nice to keep it in the family and it really goes well with our home – which now actually feels like a home.

I know, it’s kind of stupid to get excited over furniture but for some reason, it just makes me feel a sense of completion. Our house is finally furnished.



I know, I know, today is not Earth Day. It was on April 22nd.

A group of people at work decided to ride our bikes in for the day. Ray and I usually carpool but he had left for the weekend to go see his mother in California so I jumped at the opportunity to ride my bike to work.

Not to mention the opportunity to post a photo of me and my bike on my blog!

I have to apologize for not being up-to-date with my blog. I’ve been a little busy. Oh, who am I kidding? I’ve been very busy.

One of our programmers at work resigned and I was assigned his duties. It was surprising how some people at work saw this as “being dumped on”. I think it’s a fantastic opportunity. I’m learning a lot — especially in the SQL database arena. I’m a web guy who deals with databases but I’ve never had to go in and run scripts or create queries. I’ve also inherited a bunch of applications that were built in-house so there’s some programming involved. At least they guy who did all this work left behind some documentation and all of the original project files.

Yay programming! Soon, I’ll be making my own web-based applications — and no, I’m not looking for side work. People do that to me all the time. “Hey Cobban, my friend wants a website for her dog grooming business so I gave her your number and told her how much you’d love to do it.” WTF?? What did you do that for? Now I have to deal with this person who’s pissed off because they think I’m all hot to do their website and I’m not.

My other favorite is when people find out you have a design background. “You’re a designer?? Great! My kid’s soccer team needs a logo!” They expect you to, A. Pull a logo out of your ass and B. Do it for free. When finding out that the person I have just met is a dentist, I don’t open my mouth and ask for a free consultation. “You’re a mechanic?? Can you run outside and see why my car is making that funny noise??” The nerve.

So life has been kind of busy but in a good way. I’m really ready for the heat of summer. I love heat!




I grew up in a family of eight and shared a room with my little brother. There was always someone home. After high school, I moved out and had various roommates over the years. No privacy, no control, people eating your food. I wanted to be alone without being confined to a bedroom so, at twenty-five, I moved into my own apartment. I had no money for anything but rent but I didn’t care. I was alone.

Everyone should live alone at least once in their life. I did it for three years. It was the best thing in the world for me. I became reliant on myself for companionship, my own best friend, master of my domain — in my tiny little apartment.

I need my Alone Time. Hey, I love being around people but every once in a while, I need total spaz out time with myself. This weekend, I had an opportunity to document my Alone Time and now you have the opportunity to see just how much of a dork I am. I don’t care! I had a great weekend.

The video camera is kinda crappy (or I haven’t figured out how to use it) and I have not put on my video editor’s cap in a very long time but I had a blast nonetheless. (You might want to give it some volume…)