I know, I know, today is not Earth Day. It was on April 22nd.

A group of people at work decided to ride our bikes in for the day. Ray and I usually carpool but he had left for the weekend to go see his mother in California so I jumped at the opportunity to ride my bike to work.

Not to mention the opportunity to post a photo of me and my bike on my blog!

I have to apologize for not being up-to-date with my blog. I’ve been a little busy. Oh, who am I kidding? I’ve been very busy.

One of our programmers at work resigned and I was assigned his duties. It was surprising how some people at work saw this as “being dumped on”. I think it’s a fantastic opportunity. I’m learning a lot — especially in the SQL database arena. I’m a web guy who deals with databases but I’ve never had to go in and run scripts or create queries. I’ve also inherited a bunch of applications that were built in-house so there’s some programming involved. At least they guy who did all this work left behind some documentation and all of the original project files.

Yay programming! Soon, I’ll be making my own web-based applications — and no, I’m not looking for side work. People do that to me all the time. “Hey Cobban, my friend wants a website for her dog grooming business so I gave her your number and told her how much you’d love to do it.” WTF?? What did you do that for? Now I have to deal with this person who’s pissed off because they think I’m all hot to do their website and I’m not.

My other favorite is when people find out you have a design background. “You’re a designer?? Great! My kid’s soccer team needs a logo!” They expect you to, A. Pull a logo out of your ass and B. Do it for free. When finding out that the person I have just met is a dentist, I don’t open my mouth and ask for a free consultation. “You’re a mechanic?? Can you run outside and see why my car is making that funny noise??” The nerve.

So life has been kind of busy but in a good way. I’m really ready for the heat of summer. I love heat!




I grew up in a family of eight and shared a room with my little brother. There was always someone home. After high school, I moved out and had various roommates over the years. No privacy, no control, people eating your food. I wanted to be alone without being confined to a bedroom so, at twenty-five, I moved into my own apartment. I had no money for anything but rent but I didn’t care. I was alone.

Everyone should live alone at least once in their life. I did it for three years. It was the best thing in the world for me. I became reliant on myself for companionship, my own best friend, master of my domain — in my tiny little apartment.

I need my Alone Time. Hey, I love being around people but every once in a while, I need total spaz out time with myself. This weekend, I had an opportunity to document my Alone Time and now you have the opportunity to see just how much of a dork I am. I don’t care! I had a great weekend.

The video camera is kinda crappy (or I haven’t figured out how to use it) and I have not put on my video editor’s cap in a very long time but I had a blast nonetheless. (You might want to give it some volume…)

I’ve posted this photo of Ray and me visiting NYC before. The location is the State of Liberty. It’s one of the oldest photos I have of the two of us together and it perfectly represents the dynamic of our relationship. I’m the outgoing crazy person and Ray is the calm grounded gentleman (who seems to appreciate my antics).

Today marks seventeen years of togetherness for the two of us.

I am the luckiest man on the planet! Sorry other Luckiest Man in the World, it’s me, I’m at the top — or at least for today.

Some people meet, fall in love and kinda morph into a state of just…loving their other half. Not me. I am amazed at how much more in love I get with each passing year.

There are a lot of people who read my blog (all tens of them) and only know Ray from what I say about him. I’m confident the people in my life who know Ray or have at least met him, will back me up on this one: He’s probably one of the nicest guys you’ve ever met. Not to mention helpful, smart, fantastic, handsome, confident, gush, gush gush…

People frequently comment about our relationship. It’s nice to hear their kind words but I do have to point out that it’s hard work. The only reason we get along so well is because we both put a lot of effort into it. As we all know, if you put a lot of effort into something it starts to look effortless. Also, I do have to say, it isn’t always perfect. We both have our little idiosyncrasies.

Ray is the kind of man that makes me wish we could live forever. I was very immature when we first got together. Through the years, he’s been a friend, mentor, lover, partner and in many ways a father. I owe a lot to him. He’s always been there and helped shape me into the person I am today and that’s what makes a relationship. We both say, “I love you” about ten times a day.

I used to say that it didn’t matter that the laws governing the USA would not allow us to marry because we really are technically married. I’ve changed my mind. It does matter. After almost two decades together, we should be allowed the same benefits as that young couple who marry after a short courtship. In the seventeen years that we’ve been together, I’ve seen the people who enforce these rules of marriage, divorce and remarry like a wash-and-wear shirt or even better, get caught with their pants down while wife (or husband) is home taking care of the kids. But who am I to judge being the sinner that I am?

I love you Ray. That’s all that matters to me. Everyday I radiate thanks and gratitude for having you as my partner.

It’s that week. You know the one I’m talking about. The week between Christmas and New Year’s where you just unplug from all your stringent routines, throw caution to the wind and just let your hair down.

OK, so maybe you don’t do that — but I do.

Screw the workouts, forget the calorie counting, I’m going to eat everything and have seconds. Yeah, there’s stuff to be done but it can wait until next week. Right now, I have a plate of Christmas cookies to concentrate on. Stay up late. Sleep in longer. That’s what I say.

As luck would have it, in this week of unabashed gluttony, our local Safeway started carrying Maker’s 46. It was locked up in a glass case! At 35 to 40 bucks a bottle, this is the ultimate act of pampering myself for the holidays. Did I mention it’s 94 proof? This shit’s flammable and after a few shots, I’m flammable!

I can’t wait to get home and try a sample. Naturally, I’m going to start out with a small taste — neat of course and then I’ll have a Manhattan. Shaken, up, dry with a teeny-tiny splash of maraschino cherry juice. Go easy on the bitters.

Next Monday, I’ll drink my protein shake at 5:45 AM and start pushing the weights again. No more cookies, no more excessive cocktailing, no more second helpings and no more putting stuff off. I’ll be back to my disciplined self — running, working out and passing on the French fries dipped in mayonnaise.

But that’s next Monday…

Happy New Year blog peeps! Hope everyone finds their Slice O’ Heaven in 2011. It’s all good.

Ahhh, Christmas has come and gone. We spent the morning with Ray’s sister in Tucson. Family, friends, food and mimosas. Then we drove out to Gleeson (the ultimate middle of nowhere, AZ, not in a bad way) to attend a little soirée at our friends Joe & Greg’s house. More friends, dirty martinis and lots of food.

It’s hard eating and drinking all day!

But not impossible. Ray and I had a great time and went straight to bed when we returned home. I must’ve slept over ten hours — talk about the most awesome present, sleep! If only we could give sleep for Christmas.

So next up is New Year’s Eve. This year, we’re going to spend New Year’s in Phoenix with our friends Chuck & Jeff. I’m really looking forward to it. We have spent New Year’s in Bisbee every year since we moved here. I’m in the mood to do something different…like go to a bar with a lot of hot men, get drunk and dance. Bit I digress…

This is the zenith of my “Eat, drink and don’t worry about calories” holiday period.

I don’t care, I’m having french fries! Dipped in mayonnaise! Uhhmmm! Cookies! Gimme the cookies! More booze! hic Another martini? Well…it is the holidays…

But, come Monday, January 3rd (You don’t really expect this in the 1st do you?), it’s back to full-on gym and cardio. Neck doc says it’s OK to workout again. Looking forward to getting back on track but for now, this wonderful 2010 Holiday Season, I’m gonna sleep late, eat too much, drink too much, laugh with friends and stay up past my bedtime — going light on the three-and-a-half days I have to work this week of course.

One of my resolutions for the solstice/new year, is to push myself back into my creative endeavors. I really want to incorporate more music and video into my blog so…several nights ago, with the aid of a laptop, I shot hundreds of images in sequential increments. Every 6 seconds, the camera would take a two-second long exposure. It did this for several hours. By the end of the shooting sequence, I had shot over 900 images. Using Picasa, I was able to take my photographs and fuse them together in a movie. I was very excited because, since upgrading my studio, I was able to compose my own music for the piece. There was one little hitch. The video piece was about 32 seconds. When I wrote the music, I made some stupid mistake and composed something that was over a minute in length. I guess I was having so much fun…I just didn’t know where my head was. I didn’t want to redo the music and had no additional footage (I had other footage but it sucked), so I compromised with frame rate. Most video is played at 30 frames per second, I rendered this out at 17 FPS and it slowed down. It’s not as fast and fluid as it should be but it works. I may even consider…vlogging.

For your viewing pleasure:

Winter solstice is like the ultimate hump day. I absolutely loathe winter. I know, I know…we need it. If it were summer all the time, we’d all get sick of it. But seriously, once we get past the shortest day of the year, my whole mood changes.

I tend to celebrate the solstice more than any religious holiday. For me it’s a period of reflection and direction. Reflection in the sense of contemplating the past year and processing the events that occurred and direction in the sense of wondering, “What’s next?”

This year was great. It really was. Highlights include:

  • My father’s estate paid out funds. (Thanks Dad)
  • Spent a week in Miami in January.
  • Took on the lead role in an original play — British accent and all.
  • I revamped my multimedia equipment. (Thanks Dad)
  • Plumped up my investments. (Thanks Dad)
  • Traveled through Spain, France and Italy for three weeks. (Thanks Dad)
  • Performed an original monologue for Bisbee Obscure Productions Comedy Showcase.
  • Got that neck thing taken care of finally. (Thanks Dad)
  • Had a great summer full of travel and visitors.
  • Achieved some more fitness goals and hired a personal trainer.
  • Met some wonderful new friends and caught up with old ones.
  • Saw the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell.
  • Spent most of my time surrounded by positive energy.

That last one was a doozy. Even though I was dealing with my father’s death;  two of my favorite people at work moving out of the area — one of them being my boss; my neck surgery jacking up my whole system, taking a long time to heal; Jan Brewer winning the election for Arizona’s governor and some other political issues, I am choosing to remain positive about life. It’s all good. It really is.

The coolest thing about this solstice was the lunar eclipse that happened in the wee hours of the day. It’s like the moon came out and then ducked behind the Earth’s shadow for a quick rinse on my new year. A sign to tell me to let go of things. Be positive and realize that every day is a new beginning. I just happened to have my camera out and shot a little movie. The eclipse part is at the end.

I hope everyone has a kick-ass holiday season. Eat, drink and be merry! Meanwhile, I am going to finish out the month reflecting on the good things and giving thanks for Ray, my friends and family (including my kitty) and the longer, sunnier days that are just around the corner.